About Erica
My name is Erica Reid Gerdes (she/her). I grew up in Vicksburg, MS, the younger of two children to our amazing and hilarious parents, David and Patricia Reid. Dance, theatre, comedy, and music were always my career goals and passions, and I was an overachiever throughout all of my schooling. Death was always present in my life growing up, and I learned early on that it was unavoidable in life. I lost many classmates and elders close to me growing up, including my beloved dance teacher, Mrs. Atwater, whose death continues to affect me now 30ish years later.
In 2000, I moved to Chicago, IL to pursue comedy and theatre. Moving to Chicago was the most life-changing event for me, as I met life-long beloved friends, created a wonderful community and career, and met and married my husband, Fuzzy Gerdes. A month after Fuzzy and I started dating, my father was diagnosed with Stage IV Colorectal Cancer. Fuzzy and I, along with my mother, my brother Christopher and his wife Katie, cared for Dad in the 3.5 years he went through treatment, and he died in December of 2007 at age 53.
After Dad’s death, I dove headfirst into grief and loss work and along the way cared for several friends who were going through their own cancer journeys. I also became the long-distance caregiver for my mother, who suffered from multiple mental, physical, and addictive health issues. Along the way, I became interested in a more formal cancer and grief support training and I started hearing more and more about the growing community of Death Doulas. I took a few courses on grief and loss and watched about one million seminars and videos on the topic. One day, a friend sent me an article about Alua Arthur and the Going with Grace Training Program, and I instantly knew this was the right path for me. I completed the Going with Grace Training Program in April of 2021, earning my NEDA Proficiency Badge, and my life was forever changed.
Since taking my formal End of Life Doula training, I have continued my education, hosted a number of workshops and support calls with my colleague and fellow GWG graduate Jourdan Sales, and have brought comfort and support to many families in the Chicagoland area. My education also helped me cope through one of the most difficult and traumatic things I’ve ever experienced--the last year of my mother’s life. Mom died in August of 2022 at age 68, peacefully and unexpectedly, one week after moving from a horrible living situation to a safe and comfortable one.
I continue to grieve daily, and I encourage others to grieve as openly and freely as they need. We are all grieving together.
Today, my work focus is primarily on memorial rituals and legacy work, as well as advance planning and active dying support. I also acknowledge that we live in an abusive white-supremacist and suppressive patriarchal society, and I actively strive to fight against this, making death and transition work equitable to all ages, races, genders, orientations, and abilities.
Trainings + Education
NAMI Family to Family
June 2017
NAMI Chicago
Living Fully, Birthing Death
June 2020
Facilitated by Helena Dolny and Sarah Hitman
Grief and the Quest for Meaning
October 2020
Going With Grace End of Life Training
April 2021
Understanding Dementia MOOC: University of Tasmania
February 2022
Yoga Nidra Teacher Certification
April 2022
Why “Waxwing Journeys”?
Growing up, my family frequently took trips to Jackson, MS where the good malls were, and we would spend the day window shopping, seeing movies, and eating at Chili’s. One time, when my brother Christopher and I were teenagers, there was a tree filled with birds in one of the mall lots where we always parked. My dad got super excited about these birds, and started exclaiming “Cedar Waxwing! Cedar Waxwing! Cedar Waxwing!” excitedly over and over and over again, and Christopher and I--being the snarky teenagers that we were--started making fun of him about it. In a loving way, of course. We continued to tease him about it for years and years after, and it always gave the family a chuckle.
After Dad died, Christopher and I were going through his things and found a report that he had done in second grade--about the cedar waxwing. There was a crayon drawing of the bird alongside it. We instantly melted and realized that this was the source of his excitement. He saw as an adult a flock of birds he loved and studied as a child. We were so moved by this, the cedar waxwing became a symbol of our family, our father, and the love between us all.
